Oh a Scotsman clad in kilt left the bar one evening fair; and one could tell by how he walked he’d drunk more than his share.
He fumbled ’round until he could keep no longer on his feet; and he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street
CHORUS
Ring ding diddle diddle hidey ho
Ring ding diddily I Oh
(repeat last line of verse)
and he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street
Well about that time two young and lovely lassies passed him by; and one looked to the other with a twinkle in her eye.
“Do you see yon sleepin’ Scotsman so strong and handsome built? Well I wonder if it’s true what they don’t wear beneath their kilt”
CHORUS
Ring ding diddle diddle hidey ho
Ring ding diddily I Oh
(repeat last line of verse)
They crept up to the sleepin’ Scotsman quiet as could be. They lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see; and there behold for them to view beneath the Scotsman’s skirt;
there was nothin’ more than God had graced him with upon his birth
CHORUS
Ring ding diddle diddle hidey ho
Ring ding diddily I Oh
(repeat last line of verse)
Well they marveled for a moment until one said “we must be gone. Let’s leave a present for our friend before we move along”
As a gift they left a blue silk ribbon tied up in a bow
about the bonny part the Scotsman’s kilt had lift and shown.
CHORUS
Ring ding diddle diddle hidey ho
Ring ding diddily I Oh
(repeat last line of verse)
Well the Scotsman woke to Nature’s call and stumbled toward the trees. He lifted up his kilt and then he gawks at what he sees; and in the voice of wonderment at what’s before his eyes
“Akk lad I don’t know where you’ve been but I see you’ve won first prize”
CHORUS
Ring ding diddle diddle hidey ho
Ring ding diddily I Oh
(repeat last line of verse)
Our Scottish friend still clad in kilt continued down the street. He hadn’t gone 10 yards or more
when a girl he chanced to meet.
She said, I’ve heard whats under there.
Please tell me if its so.
He said, “Why dont you reach right up,
And give yourself a go?”
CHORUS
Ring ding diddle diddle hidey ho
Ring ding diddily I Oh
(repeat last line of verse)
She stuck her hand right up his kilt, and Great was her surprise. She looked up at the Scotsman who had twinkles in his eyes.
She cried, “Why Sir thats gruesome!”
And then she heard him roar
He said, “If you reach up once again
You’ll find it’s grew some more!”
CHORUS
Ring ding diddle diddle hidey ho
Ring ding diddily I Oh
(repeat last line of verse)
The Scotmans Hands were numb with drink
His head was spinning round. He couldnt get that ribbon off, so homeward he was bound
His wife she caught a flash of blue as he took off all his clothes; And it piqued her curiosity as well you might suppose.
CHORUS
Ring ding diddle diddle hidey ho
Ring ding diddily I Oh
(repeat last line of verse)
Well then she asked that Scotsman where he’d been and what he’d done.
He said there was a contest at the pub and that he’d won.
She cried, You did not show that thing in front of all those men? I did not show it all my love, but just enough to win.
CHORUS
Ring ding diddle diddle hidey ho
Ring ding diddily I Oh
(repeat last line of verse)
